When historian and journalist Tony Perrottet first met Dr. John K. Lattimer, the elderly American urologist who bought Napoleons penis at auction in 1977, he was introduced to the doctors extraordinary collection of historical memorabilia kept in his New Jersey homeincluding Nazi suicide vials, medieval chastity belts, Abraham Lincolns blood-stained collar, Marilyn Monroes bathing suit and JFK assassination relics. The doctors omnivorous interest echoed the passions of 18th century scholars and the largely forgotten use of Secret Cabinetsspecially designated rooms within the worlds great museums where anything deemed scandalous was safeguarded under lock and key and access was granted only to a lucky few. With that time-honored model in mind, Perrottet decided to put together a collection of the choicest morsels culled from the dark recesses of Western history for the edification of the modern reader.
Napoleons Privates: 2,500 Years of History Unzipped is a shamelessly entertaining guide to the arcana of history, a book that unearths the most exciting new research on themes that interest us deeplysex, celebrity, wealth, greed and debauchery through the agesand transforms it into an immediately accessible form. The result is a compendium of fascinating and irreverent stories that are guaranteed to add zest to any modern dinner party conversation.
Luckily, history is full of such jaw-dropping anecdotesand just by recounting them, Perrottet shows, we can learn a huge amount about history without even trying. What was it really like to wear a chastity belt? Were champagne glasses molded from Marie Antoinettes breasts? Is it true that Italian castrati made better lovers? What were the dreaded French impotence trials? Why did the Marquis de Sade hate his mother-in-law? And what was J. Edgar Hoovers favorite evening dress? In Napoleons Privates, Perrottet shows how even the most frivolous-sounding question can provide a vivid entrée to forgotten worlds of the past.
A terrifically funny writer... Informative and twice as
quirky.
Boston Globe
It’s so great to have a truly funny (and poetic) writer
putting the lurid colors back on the pale marble, where they
belong... Full of the ‘get-a-load-of-this’
factorthose juicy, vivid stories you can’t wait to tell
your friends. To my mind, that quality is the distinguishing trait
of great nonfiction.
Teller of Penn & Teller
Its refreshing to find such an entertaining writer
whose history is also meticulously researched. Perrottets take
on the past is erudite, original and wittyeven, frequently,
hilarious.
Paul Cartledge, Professor of Classics, Cambridge University
NAPOLEON IS DEAD! LONG LIVE NAPOLEONS PRIVATES!
Celebrity memorabilia is big business these days, with Marilyn Monroes bra or Mohammed Alis boxers fetching astronomical prices at auction. But for specialist collectors, one intimate item is in a different class entirely: Napoleons penis.
To the horror of the French government, which refuses to accept its authenticity, the relic has drifted around Europe and the U.S. since the Emperors death in exile in 1821, dried out like beef jerky and kept in a leather presentation box adorned with a gold-embossed crown. Adding insult to injury, the item now resides in a suitcase under a bed in suburban New Jersey. How could such a sacrilege occur? According to its 19th century owners, the organ was illegally removed during Napoleons autopsy by his vindictive and possibly murderous physician, Dr. Francesco Antommarchi, then smuggled back to France by his corrupt, greedy chaplain, the Abbé Ange Vignali….
Follow the long march of Napoleons privates on page 20.
THE CHAMPAGNE-BREAST CONNECTION
How best to worship the perfect breast? Throughout history, men have dreamed of sipping fine wine from replicas of their lovers busts, cast in glittering crystal. In antiquity, a temple on the island of Rhodes displayed a goblet that was believed to have been modeled on the breasts of Helen of Troy by her paramour Paris. In the Middle Ages, love-besotted French king Henry II had his wine glasses fashioned on the "apple-like" breasts of Diane de Poitier. And in the late 1700s, the legend sprang up that Queen Marie-Antoinettes breasts were the model for the shallow, broad-rimmed champagne coupes that are still often used today. (Although the modern fashion is more for the tall, thin and decidedly un-breast-like champagne flutes).
Find the truth about bubbly and breasts on page 3 of Napoleons Privates.
SCENT OF A FÜHRER
Guests at the Berghof, Hitlers private chalet in the Bavarian Alps, must have endured some unpleasant odors in the otherwise healthful mountain air.
It may sound like a Woody Allen scenario, but medical historians are unanimous that Adolf was the victim of uncontrollable flatulence. Spasmodic stomach cramps, constipation and diarrhea, possibly the result of nervous tension, had been Hitlers curse since childhood and only grew more severe as he aged. As a stressed-out dictator, the agonizing digestive attacks would occur after most meals: Albert Speer recalled that the Führer, ashen-faced, would leap up from the dinner table and disappear to his room.
This was an embarrassing problem for a ruthless leader of the Third Reich. . . .
Find out how Hitlers favorite flatulence cure may have cost him the war on page 204 of Napoleons Privates.
WHAT WAS J. EDGAR HOOVERS FAVORITE PARTY OUTFIT?
The spectacle of the fleshy FBI chief lurching around the corridors of New Yorks Plaza Hotel in drag is now indelibly lodged in American popular folklore. The story has is deeply satisfying, since it proves that the powerful Hoover, who monitored, harassed and blackmailed thousands of Americans about their sex lives, was a rank and villainous hypocrite. Unfortunately, it is based entirely on the testimony of only one witness - Susan Rosenstiel, the former wife of a wealthy liquor distiller, who was quoted at length in the over-heated Official and Confidential: The Secret Life of J. Edgar Hoover, a 1993 biography by muckraking Brit Anthony Summers and excerpted in Vanity Fair magazine....
Find out what really happened at the Plaza Hotel on page 200 of Napoleons Privates.
What were Casanovas best pick-up lines?
(They got better as he got older).
How uncomfortable was it to wear a chastity belt?
(Surviving examples are so bizarre, were they ever worn at
all?)
Which Italian Renaissance genius "discovered"
the clitoris?
(He could have just asked the Venetian nuns).
Will Lincoln ever be outed?
(Just because he spent three years sharing his best
friends bed...)
What was the party etiquette at Caligulas
orgies?
(Holding ones own could be a stressful business in
ancient Rome).
What were condoms made from in the 17th century?
(At least the material was organic).
How were impotence sufferers put on trial in medieval
France?
(And why this should be a new reality TV show).
What were the kinkiest private clubs of Hogarthian
London?
(Austin Powers would have blanched).
And what was the truth about Napoleons
privates?
(Was it a big baguette or petit éclair? And did size
matter to Josephine?)